


Balcony

by Glambertal



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec is sorry, Author doesn't know how to do italics on this website, Conversations, Creative title i know, Explicit Language, Frustrated Magnus, M/M, Magnus is annoyed, Malec being adults, POV Magnus Bane, S2E1 of shadowhunters, Still, This Guilty Blood, but only in his thoughts, swears, you saw the episode you know what happens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-06
Updated: 2017-01-06
Packaged: 2018-09-15 04:09:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9218339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glambertal/pseuds/Glambertal
Summary: Magnus is pissed.Maybe not pissed, exactly, but he's pretty fucking mad.He'd done so much for the Nephilim, done so much for Alec, and now...





	

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: wow im back after having deleted all of my works! This was inspired by my feelings on This Guilty Blood, and more specifically, Alec and Magnus. 
> 
> Un-beta'd, all mistakes are my own. I don't own the characters, rights go to Freeform. 
> 
> (Also, can we talk about how they handled that fight so maturely?? Cassandra Clare would never)

Magnus is pissed. 

Maybe not pissed, exactly, but he's pretty fucking mad. 

He'd done so much for the Nephilim, done so much for Alec, and now...

He understands Alec's feelings, he understands why he's acting why he is, that's not the problem. He understands the depth of the parabatai bond, he's seen it in the past with Will and Jem. When your soul is bound to another and they're in physical and emotional pain, it can be excruciating to deal with, to deal with the strain and worry, to not understand what's happening to them and to feel powerless. It's not something he'd wish on even the elder Lightwoods, though Robert went through a similar experience with his own parabatai. 

So no, the problem didn't lie in the way Alec was behaving, it didn't lie in how he was feeling, because that wasn't something Magnus was prepared to judge him for. It was in what he said. How he was willing to say what he knew damn well wasn't true, if only to guilt him into helping him do something that would threaten his life. 

It was how he just didn't get it. How he didn't see who he was hurting in his frustrations, how he seemingly saw only himself in their relationship, whatever it truly was at that point. He was so wrapped up in everything that was happening to him that he didn't see that Magnus himself was struggling. Magnus knew it was unfair to judge him in that aspect, because that was his parabatai that was being tortured, and of course that's all he could think about, but every little thing built and built until Magnus had had exactly enough, and he'd left. 

“I don't think you do.” Talking about how he understands how Alec felt, how he could relate on some level, because he'd lost Ragnor only days ago, and to be shut down so quickly, dismissed before he could begin, just made him even more frustrated.  
He'd watched his best friend be killed by a shax demon, held him in his arms while life bled out of him, unable to do anything to help. He'd lost one of the people he was never have supposed to lose, one who was supposed to be with him forever, after centuries of friendship, and not one person ever even thought to ask how he was feeling.  
Yet there he was, doing everything he could to help the Nephilim, for christ sakes, and he was told that he couldn't possibly understand how Alec was feeling. He knew it wasn't exactly the same, that the parabatai bond went far beyond simply friendship, but still. 

Magnus was a bit irritated. 

He was on the balcony, cat eyes flashing as he focused on the ball of magic floating between his hands, muscles tense. His body was practically vibrating, crackling like a live wire, pent up frustrations slowly fusing over.

He heard the footsteps from the moment the door opened, and he grit his teeth to keep him from making a noise of frustration as he put his glamour back up, hating that he still had to do that around the Nephilim. It was one of the last things he wanted to be doing, right after continuing the same repetitive argument.  
He continued practicing the Tai Chi, refusing to acknowledge Alec in that moment. If he wanted to talk, he could start the conversation on his own. 

"Magnus," The deep voice told him that he was right in his assumption that it was indeed Alexander in his loft, still standing inside, shifting uncomfortably as if he wasn't quite sure what exactly he was doing there himself. 

"I'm not good at apologies, but I'm- I'm sorry,"

Magnus was vaguely surprised, and he felt himself begin to falter in his movements before he recollected himself before he slipped visibly. 

"Continue,"

Alec made a small noise, like he wasn't actually expecting Magnus to say anything, as if he hadn't thought further than: "I'm sorry." It was confirmed in what he said next.

"I'm... Really sorry?"

It sounded more like a question than a statement, and Magnus hummed, still moving, not having turned to do so much as look at Alec. 

"For?"

Alec made a frustrated noise and Magnus could practically see him frowning to himself. "Look, can you just cut that out for a second?"

Magnus complied, tossing the ball of magic behind him, directly at Alec's head. Alec was a Nephilim, of course, reflexes sharp enough to dodge it, even if it was harmless and hit the lamp instead. Regardless, the vindictive part of him had to admit that it felt nice.  
He knew he was being petty, that Alec was trying, but Magnus could quite bring himself to care yet. A simple "I'm sorry" wasn't enough for him to forgive and forget, even if it was a struggle for a shadowhunter to apologize to a downworlder. 

"You were right," Alec admitted, finally stepping onto the balcony. "When I called off my wedding, that was for me. But this is all just-" Alec cut himself off, as if struggling to find the proper words to explain how he was feeling. "Very new,"

Magnus paused in doing up his sweater, facing Alec for the first time. "This may surprise you, but you're new for me too," He snapped, resuming his task, but not before he saw the look on Alec's face that showed that that did indeed surprise him. 

Alec sighed heavily. "Look, with Jace missing, it's just like..." He paused again, hands moving incoherently. "The ground has shifted and I can't keep my balance- hey, just-" 

He grabbed Magnus's bicep as he attempted to walk past Alec and inside his loft, only to be pulled back out. Alec's eyes were vulnerable, showing every emotion he'd been struggling to hold in. 

"I didn't mean to take it out on you." Alec sighed, still holding onto him as if he were afraid Magnus would leave before he got his message across. "I'm sorry," He repeated. 

Magnus observed him carefully, trying to find the proper words to say in this situation. Part of him wanted to say “it's okay,” if only to get that worried, sad look off of his face. But it wasn't okay. He couldn't say that, because none of what Alec said to him was okay, and he wasn't prepared to let another Nephilim, especially one he cared so much about, to think it was okay to talk down on him. Alec however, was still watching him, apprehensive and body visibly tensed, jarringly similar to how Magnus himself was earlier. 

So he settled for something simple. 

"You're forgiven,"

Alec let out a sigh of relief, closing his eyes momentarily, which was so painfully endearing that Magnus had to say something to keep him looking so uncharacteristically happy. 

"Also," he paused, letting Alec look up at him, eyes curious. Magnus smiled "You're great at apologies," 

He reached a hand up, touching the collar of Alec's jacket. He was playing with it more than actually fixing anything, but it made Alec's cheeks burn red and he ducked his head to the side to hide a smile, so Magnus considered it helpful anyways. 

Alec walked to the edge of the balcony, still grinning slightly. Magnus felt proud to have put that look on his face. 

"Thanks," Alec said, hands resting on the ledge. "I've been working on it,"

And well that-

That was far too adorable to have been said from a six foot two, revered shadowhunter. Alec had practiced apologizing to Magnus, because it mattered so much to him that he refused to mess up before Magnus could understand how much he meant it. The thought made Magnus a bit dizzy and he shook his head a bit, composing himself before joining Alec at the edge of the balcony. 

"Here's the thing," he began, and Alec looked over at him, suddenly serious, because he somehow knew that this was going to be important. 

"We're always going to face challenges," Magnus continued. "So when things get crazy, don't... Push me away,"

Alec was still for a moment, before nodding seriously, looking every bit a soldier taking his commands, which would have been comical if not for the irony of Magnus being a downworlder. 

He was so used to being looked at with distain when it came from the Nephilim, being looked at as if he was something so much lesser, an instrument to be used when needed, yet otherwise un-useful.  
Yet here was this boy, who had practiced an apology, and was listening so intently to what Magnus had to say to him, as if it were something so direly important, as if Magnus were something so direly important. 

He grabbed Alec's hand that was resting on the concrete edge of the balcony, fingers curling around his palm and thumb tracing Alec's knuckle. 

It fit beautifully.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: this was my first work in this fandom so I hope I didn't screw up royally. 
> 
> Loved it? Let me know. Have something I should fix or work on? Let me know. Comments and kudos are appreciated.


End file.
